As seen below, I have already discussed 5 of my top 10 dating tips. These tips are useful for both bros and ladies alike. Feel free to comment or respond to me if you feel differently! Here are the next 5:
6) Be polite. Something I always notice on a date is how the other person treats the bartender, waiter, or anyone else who is helping us. You can tell a lot by a person by their manners and if they’re nice and polite to strangers. A huge turn-off to me is when I’m with someone at a restaurant or bar, and they treat the employees like crap. This is their job, this is how they make money, don’t be an ass! I also usually notice if they tip or not. Also, while on the topic of manners, please don’t curse like a sailor on a date. I know we all have our slip-ups, and some of us may even curse on the regular and not even notice. But on a first date, try to keep the cursing to a minimum if you can. I would only use it if completely necessary or if you’re quoting something. Cursing really isn’t the end of the world, but I think generally speaking, you should keep it to a minimum when you first start dating someone. You don’t want to give off the wrong impression!
7) Don’t get too drunk. In the world of online dating and blind dates, sometimes first dates are also the first time you actually meet someone in person. I’m sure a lot of us have been there, and let me tell ya, it can be awkward. Typically, most people I know (at least most girls I know) will have a drink while they’re getting ready for the date. This drink is meant to calm the nerves and make you feel a little more loose (don’t be gross) on the date. I’d stick to one drink, anything more than that, especially on an empty stomach, could be disaster. When you arrive at your date, you generally have a drink whether you’re eating dinner or just hanging at a bar. If you’re out for dinner, I think you’ll be a little safer because at least you’ll have some food in your stomach. However, a lot of first dates are for drinks and dinner dates are saved for date 2 or 3. Ladies and gents, if you’re just going out for drinks, don’t get drunk. We’re all old enough to know our limits. Some of us may be feeling pretty tipsy after 2 drinks, and it may take about 5 drinks for some other people. You know your body and your limits (if you don’t, there’s a larger problem at hand…). Getting a little tipsy is fine, but don’t get to a point where you’re pouring your heart out about your job that you hate, your dog who just died, or anything that would require a Debbie Downer WOMP WOMP in the background. Also, the more intoxicated you are, the more likely you are to engage in “intimate” or “sexual behavior”, which would typically be saved for a later date. Basically, drinking too much alcohol leads to making questionable decisions, so just don’t do it.
8) Split the bill or Bros pay. Sorry guys, call me old-fashion, but girls LOVE it when guys pay for the first date. I know it sucks and everyone is on a budget, but that’s just how the dating game works. Girls, you should ALWAYS offer to split the bill or pay tip. If you really are on a tight budget, take her up on splitting the bill, or tell her that she can owe you a couple drinks NEXT time (which is great because then you are also inferring that you want to see each other again). Bros, if you take a girl on a first date, you should pick the spot. By you picking the spot, it shows that you’ve put some thought into it, it shows that you can take initiative (sexy), AND it also gives you the freedom to see how much you’re willing to spend. If you’re on a tight budget, take her to a low key bar with good deals. Most bars around the city feature different deals throughout the week. Check their websites to see what will be featured that night, and take it from there! If that’s not a concern, go crazy and get some fun cocktails and appetizers. If you get to a point where you start dating a person regularly, then splitting the bill would be more cost effective. But until then, guys you gotta be willing to throw down some dollah billz.
9) Don’t lead your date on. Say you have a first date with someone, and it doesn’t go well. It has happened to ALL of us. Sometimes we just don’t click with people. It’s life, it’s not the end of the world, and you move on. In my experience, there’s usually one party who thinks the date went better. If this is the case, be honest. Sometimes both parties are like, wow this date is awful, let’s take shots and never see each other again! If that’s the case, awesome. However, many times one person will reach out about a second or another date. In this situation, it can tricky. Do you have to “dump” someone after a first date? No, I don’t think so. I think if you’ve only been on one date with the person, and you won’t run into them again through friends, you can just not answer their calls or texts, and if they’re a normal human being, they’ll get the picture. But this is where it can be a sticky situation. If you already knew the person, either through mutual friends, work, a hobby or sport, and so on, I think the right thing to do would to be honest. You are allowed to tell the other person that you had a great time getting to know them on the date, but that you can only offer them your friendship. Done and done. If you’ve been on multiple dates, then I really think it’s necessary to close that chapter officially. It will give the other person closure and peace of mind. No one likes being led on, and no one likes being flaked on. It is much better to officially end something (in a polite and nice way) then to just cut off contact completely. It’s a more honest, mature, and ballsy move, and the other person will ultimately respect you more for it in the long-run.
10) HAVE FUN! Now that I got all the serious preaching out of the way, here is the most important rule of dating: ENJOY YOURSELF! Dating is supposed to be fun, exciting, entertaining, weird, awkward, romantic, funny, and so on. The worst case scenario when going on a date, especially a blind date, is that it will be awful, but then you have something to talk about with your friends at after-work drinks. Everyone loves a funny story about a weird date. An ideal scenario is that you met someone who you really enjoy as a person and have chemistry with. If that’s the case, ask them out again and see where that takes you! Dating isn’t a sprint. You can take your time and get to know the person. You can even date around (just be careful about that…can get sticky!). Just be honest, be yourself, take a chill pill, and enjoy the ride!
Hope you all learned something! Feel free to comment or e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org or tweet me @notyouraveragebr0 for any more questions or if you want to add on to the list!